It's easy to forget that we are all perfect in our own design. Sometimes we muck it up with habits and choices that do not serve us. 

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Are You Perpetuating a Controlling Relationship System?

control

For example, Sadie found herself in the same interaction over and over with her husband, Benjamin. The interaction would go something like this:

Most of us in relationships have an easy time seeing how the other person is being controlling, and a very hard time seeing it in ourselves. We also generally don’t recognize that any time we are trying to control, we are creating an energy loop that perpetuates the dysfunctional relationship system.

Benjamin, in a judgmental voice: “You never seem to want to cuddle or make love anymore. What’s wrong with you?”

Sadie, in a kind voice: “Benjamin, are you aware of how often you criticize me? Don’t you see what you are doing that is causing problems in our relationship?”

Benjamin: “I’m fine. I’m not the problem. Maybe you need some hormones or something. You’re the one with the problem.”

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248 Hits

When it is Loving to You to Control – and When it’s Not

mammatus-storm-clouds-saskatchewan-picture-id587216208 Your Guidance is Always Here For You

The kind of control that actually blocks our ability to access spirit is when we try to control what we can’t control – such as others’ feelings and actions, and outcomes of events. We also block our access to spirit when we try to control our own feelings with our various forms of self-abandonment – staying in our heads, judging ourselves, turning to addictions, and making others responsible for our worth and safety. All these attempts to control lower our frequency and make it very hard to access our guidance. We cut ourselves off from the ongoing flow of love and truth when we lower our own frequency through our own unloving thoughts and actions.
I often hear from clients that they have a hard time connecting with their spiritual guidance, and they wonder why. They also get confused about when controlling creates a problem and when it doesn’t.

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370 Hits

The Secret Key To End Suffering In All Relationships

couple-standing-at-beach-with-arm-around-picture-id1189859858 The Secret Key To End Suffering In All Relationships
Relationships are one of the most common sources of suffering. It can cause such joy but also confusion and pain. We often approach relationships as if our partner is someone that we own. "You're mine." We go into a relationship thinking they will solve all our problems and fill the void.

Don't place your worth on another person. Don't depend on them to have self-value. You should feel completely secure with or without them. Your partner doesn't belong to you. You serve each other and help each other fulfill their purpose but your happiness shouldn't depend on them. Love cannot exist when manipulation is present. Trying to control another person is not love.

When you can truly love the other person and yourself without conditions, you will end suffering in relationships.
  462 Hits
462 Hits

You Are Enough – Flexibility

iStock-185421707 You Are Enough – Flexibility

Life will always challenge you in order to bring you from rigidity to flexibility, from control to allowing.

When you relate to life too rigidly, the first hardship that blows in your direction will leave you flat. It is for that reason that the most powerful, life-­giving posture you can take is one of inner flexibility.

When you are rooted in the Essential Self, when you have trust that everything is unfolding in divine order, the need to force the circumstances of your life into a predetermined outcome, like a square peg into a round hole, simply evaporates.

Rigidity and grasping for control are not in alignment with the unrelenting flow of life, which is always moving toward expansion and evolution. Life will always challenge your preconceived notions about how things should be. This challenge is part of your evolution. When life sees rigidity, it only wants to flow, gracefully and smoothly. When life sees you grasping for control, it only wants you to be in a stream of receiving and allowing.

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631 Hits

How Yoga Helps To Control Bad Habits

woman-training-yoga-mountains-on-background-picture-id936401520 How Yoga Helps To Control Bad Habits

It is said, bad habits are hard to break. But we’re the ones who can undo it making space for other good habits and train our mind to bring the necessary change. Know how to use yoga to control and break bad habits with a holistic approach.

The secret to permanently breaking any bad habit is to love something greater than the habit.”
- Bryant McGill


Got a bad habit that you can’t just break? Fret not; apply the holistic approach to hack them away.

When we leave our mind to itself, it follows certain habits like a groove. This can be amazing only if the habits are not hampering the body’s balance. In the process of devising certain habits, we often ignore both the emotional and physical need. Certain habits or bad behavior are hard to change. Even after many efforts, most of the old habits are relentless.

Enter Yoga! That makes us aware of our ability to change our mind in order to turn down the habits.

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1303 Hits

How to Be In Control of Your Wellness

deepak-chopra-how-to-be-in-control-of-your-wellness-final

Although most people still view being sick in terms of germs, catching a cold, and getting a flu shot, the question of who gets sick and who stays well is far more complex. Everyone is exposed to thousands of microbes a day, and some of these are disease-causing pathogens. But we have immunity to a wide range of pathogens, and although sickness is fended off by the cells of the immune system, staying well involves the whole person.

There is a medical concept known as “control by the host,” which focuses on how much of staying well is an internal process that calls upon both mind and body. The invisible roots of lifelong wellness turn out to be surprising. For example, researchers at the University of Texas Medical School looked at mortality rates among a group of men and women who had received open heart surgery, including heart bypass and replacement of the aortic valve. If you take the routine medical approach, the reason someone dies six months after open heart surgery while someone else doesn’t must come down to a physical difference. But the team headed by Dr. Thomas Oxman took an unorthodox approach. They asked these patients two questions about their social situation: Do you participate regularly in organized social groups? Do you draw strength and comfort from your religion or spiritual faith?

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1343 Hits

How To Stop Worrying and Have Faith

KuteBlacksonBLog_worry

Worry is a waste of time.


It changes nothing.


Most of the things you are worrying about now, you won’t remember in a few years.


Stop focusing on the small stuff that you won’t even remember a week from now, and certainly not on your death bed.


Life gives you no refunds for the time you spent worrying.


What you focus on expands, so focus on what is truly important and meaningful to you. Decide to constantly feed what is beautiful about yourself and your life rather than what isn’t.


The quality of your life will be determined by the quality of your attention. And this is your choice.


By trying to furiously control life, you often end up controlled by it.

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3405 Hits

The 5 Causes of Suffering and How To Stop

5causesofsuffering

Suffering is caused by the story you make up about your reality.


What stories are you making up about yourself, your life and those around you?


What impact are they having?


It’s not what happens to you but how you interpret and what you make things mean that causes you suffering.


Suffering is not a requirement.


Pain is inevitable and suffering is optional.


You choose.


We sometimes become addicted to suffering as a false way to feel alive, and struggle becomes the drug of choice that we use for a cheap high.

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2457 Hits