How Do You Learn to Love Yourself?


It is a question I am asked all of the time.


When I think back to how I began the process of learning to love myself, it was 10 steps. When I was 19 years old, I read a book called You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay. You know Louise Hay, right? She is one of the most incredible teachers of Self-Love there has ever been. She left this world on August 30th of this year, at the perfect age of 90. She truly was a teacher of absolute unconditional SELF-LOVE. I do the work I do because of this woman’s words, strung together in that amazing book, that I read back in 1990.

I am sure you have heard of the book, and have probably read it. It has sold millions and millions of copies world wide. It was a transformational LIFE-CHANGING book for me. When I read it the first time, I just had more questions. Some seeds got planted, but I didn’t really do anything with them.

However, a few of those seeds were watered. Six months later, I picked the book up again, and this time, not only did I read it, but I really READ it. Like I FELT it. I DID the exercises. I GOT IT!

It changed my life. The first thing I did was start talking nicer to myself. It was sooooo HARD, but I did it. I figured, what I was doing wasn’t working, so I might as well try something different. Within 9 months, I had moved out of my VERY unhealthy alcoholic boyfriend’s “shack” with my 14-month-old son. I began to find some self-esteem. I started to see some value, make some plans, show up differently.

It is a very long story, and one I don’t need to share here, but the purpose of sharing this part of the story is this: YOU CAN LEARN to LOVE YOURSELF!!!! If I can do it, you can do it!

Check out these 10 steps by Louise Hay. Which ones can you adopt, right now? Which ones are you willing to work on … today? Will you make a commitment to yourself, this minute, to take a step towards self-love? If you will, I’ll be here to hold your hand. I know how scary it can be … to let go of the old story, but come on … it is SOOOO OLD!Right?

It’s time for a new story …

So, check out the steps below … what steps you are willing to take? I can’t wait to watch your life blossom too. It really does work  My favorites are #1 and #9  GAME CHANGERS!!!!!!!!!

How to LOVE yourself – Louise Hay

1. Stop all criticism: Criticism never changes a thing. Refuse to criticize yourself. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Everybody changes. When you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are positive.

2. Don’t scare yourself: Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. It’s a dreadful way to live. Find a mental image that gives you pleasure (mine is yellow roses), and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought.

3. Be gentle and kind and patient: Be gentle with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn the new ways of thinking. Treat yourself as you would someone you really loved.

4. Be kind to your mind: Self-hatred is only hating your own thoughts. Don’t hate yourself for having the thoughts. Gently change the thoughts.

5. Praise yourself: Criticism breaks the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing.

6. Support yourself: Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends, and allow them to help you. It is being strong to ask for help when you need it.

7. Be loving to your negatives: Acknowledge that you created them to fulfill a need. Now you are finding new, positive ways to fulfill those needs. So, lovingly release the old negative patterns.

8. Take care of your body: Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise can you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in.

9. Mirror work: Look into your own eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself looking into the mirror. Talk to your parents looking into the mirror. Forgive them, too. At least once a day, say: “I love you, I really love you!”

10. LOVE YOURSELF – DO IT NOW! Don’t wait until you get well or lose the weight, or get the new job, or find the new relationship. Begin NOW – do the best you can.


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