Loneliness is one of the “problems” with growing. Sometimes, in order to connect with yourself, you have to separate from what you’ve known. The aliveness of love will ruin your chances of stagnation. It will call you out. Success demands loss. Sometimes, we have to let go of waning definitions, circumstances, or relationships that no longer reflect us so that we can blossom wide…
I’d Rather Lose a Friend, than Lose Myself
So I’m moving on. I’m taking that love with me. I’m no longer looking for support where it’s not. I’m also not making myself wrong for wanting support. I don’t care how brilliant you are on stage, how many trophies line your walls, or how much money you sock away in investments, this I know. We are all fragile, especially if we’re courageous. Those of us who continue to grow, continue to step out onto new ledges. We continue to move beyond what we have known into the beckoning of uncertainty.
Yes, I have my Beloved within. Yes I know I am safe at all times in this Universe. And yes, I finally love myself enough to want to be, at least in my inner circle, around people who want the best for me at all times. This isn’t narcissistic neediness, as my inner critic has sometimes roared in journals. This is self-respect.
So I’m clearing the space. I’m not reaching out to this individual anymore, even in times when I’m going through something I’d want to share. I’m opting for loneliness rather than smallness. I’d rather lose a friend, than lose myself. I’m doing inner house-cleaning, waving an emotional smudge stick, and, screw furniture placement, I’m opting for some relationship Feng shui.
This is real growth for me.… I’m opting for loneliness rather than smallness. I’d rather lose a friend, than lose myself. I’m doing inner house-cleaning, waving an emotional smudge stick, and, screw furniture placement, I’m opting for some relationship Feng shui.
This is real growth for me.
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